Sunday, October 30, 2005

Uh Oh - The Plague

Memed from Dana

You have Bubonic Plague How you get it: Close contact with an infected host. Fleas, cats, rats and squirrels are the most common hosts. Incubation period: 2 to 6 days Early symptoms: Fever, Chills, Sore throat, Headache, Weakness, Malaise, Nausea, Diarrhea, Gastrointestinal distress, Cough, Bloody sputum, Shortness of breath, Stiff neck Symptoms at full disease onset: Gangrene and necrosis of areas such as the digits, penis. Bleeding from body openings, red circular lesions form on skin. Final outcome of this horrible disease: The rosy lesions. “bubos,” that have gradually formed on the skin begin to necrotize, turning the skin black, especially in the extremities. Internal lesions become infectious pustules that seep into the bloodstream causing blood poisoning, or “septicemia,” and eventually death. There is nothing you can do now but wait for death to arrive and hope it comes quickly. Make your peace. get your own internet diagnosis

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1. If you get gangrene of the penis, I’ll be extremely concerned for any number of reasons

   Leigh-Ann  on  10/30  at  12:48 PM

2. A nice, quiet Sunday evening shot all to hell with the following cheeriness ... I have:

   You have Creutzfeldt-Jakob

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   How you get it: Genetic; variant (Mad Cow) acquired by eating the brain or nervous tissue of an infected animal. Like Kuru, this is a prion disorder.
   Incubation period: 1 to 30 years
   Early symptoms: Confusion, involuntary muscle jerks, insomnia, impaired judgment, memory, and vision
   Symptoms at full disease onset: Loss of muscular coordination, slurred speech, severe mental impairment.
   Final outcome of this horrible disease: Systematic loss of brain function over the course of a year within onset of symptoms. Inability to control muscles, blindness, cognitive failure, coma, death.

   There is nothing you can do now but wait for death to arrive and hope it comes quickly. Make your peace.

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   get your own internet diagnosis

    on  10/30  at  03:35 PM

3. If it helps any, I’m going to die much much sooner than you.  And apparently get gangrene of my penis.

    on  10/30  at  06:32 PM

4. I have Hantavirus Pulmonary Syndrome.  I don’t think it’s fair that I die of this after having ONLY JUST survived one-fanged snakebite.

   Helly  on  10/31  at  05:15 AM

5. I’m dying of mad cow disease, woman, yet it’s all about your nonexistent penis! 

   And look at the silver lining ... with “rosy lesions” and gangrene, you’ll be sporting festive holiday colors…

    on  10/31  at  05:43 AM

6. You have Necrotizing Fasciitis.

   Final outcome of this horrible disease: Rapid degeneration of the body under the effects of the toxins released by the bacteria, causing severe nausea, deep tissue pain, unconsciousness, death.

   There is nothing you can do now but wait for death to arrive and hope it comes quickly. Make your peace.

   That is comforting. 

   Expat  on  11/03  at  12:34 PM

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