Flippy - I Rant, You Read
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
I Hate Myself Because…
I find Fergie’s music to be catchy and enjoyable, yet I find Fergie herself to be rather, uh, skanky. I guess things could be worse, I could be a closeted Republican man (it’s almost always the men, isn’t it?) who hated myself for being gay, but couldn’t stay away from gay sex in the men’s room. Yo, shout out to Senator Larry Craig! He’s this week’s hypocritical “Family Values” spokesman. Honestly, it sure seems like there are more gay Republicans than Democrats, only the gay Republicans are closeted and having dangerous and/or illegal sex, and they must be desperately unhappy. If the Republican Party could just support gay rights, yet stick to their supposed (I say “supposed” because spending recklessly to send our budget surplus quickly soaring into a horrendous deficit like no other isn’t exactly fiscally conservative, is it?) other objectives, perhaps there wouldn’t be a nasty sex scandal every week. Damn, they make Bill Clinton’s assignations seem almost harmless. Well, they were harmless (assuming they were all consensual), except to Hillary. But, they seem to have worked it out, figuring that they’re better together than apart. Good for them. Maybe their marriage isn’t hot & heavy romantically, but they must have fascinating conversations.
When it comes down to it, fascinating conversations should be a bigger part of a marriage than sex. After all, there are 24 hours in a day, and even the most physically fit of us wouldn’t have enough stamina to have more sex than talk. Which brings us back to poor ol’ Sen. Craig - maybe he isn’t gay, but he sure does like anonymous gay sex, and since it doesn’t take up that much of his time, perhaps his wife is okay with that. Isn’t it horrible how all these Republican wives have to stand next to their disgraced husbands during the press conferences? What on earth would a guy have to do to make that up their wife? I imagine the very least of it would be doing chores around the house without fail, putting the toilet seat down, and putting the cap back on the toothpaste.
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Part of last night’s Larry Craig conversation in our household:
Alan is griping about the hypocrisy involved in Craig actively opposing all sorts of gay rights measures, yet (allegedly) engaging in gay sex himself.
Alan: ...if he’s gay, he’s gay. That’s not the problem. He should just admit it and be done with it. He needs to just MAN UP.
Helly: As I understand it, he was trying to, honey.
Helly on 08/29 at 04:54 AM -
If the Republican Party wasn’t so (mostly) damned anti-gay, there wouldn’t be so many miserable closeted gay Republican men. It’s really awful, and sad that they live these hypocritical lives. Imagine voting against your own people because you’re afraid that someone might guess that you’re gay.
And yeah, he was trying to MAN UP in the men’s room, with his, uh, wide stance. I can’t believe the silly excuses these guys come up with to explain coming on to other guys in the bathroom. But here’s some excellent advice for them - http://www.palmbeachpost.com/opinion/content/local_news/epaper/2007/08/29/w1b_binocol_0829.html
on 08/29 at 05:13 AM -
I like Fergie’s music, particularly Big Girls Don’t Cry. But mainly, I wish I had a six-pack like that.
I have no problem with cheating- If it is agreed upon in the relationship rules. Mine doesn’t let me. But I know people who Do, and I’m okay with that. It only works if you are honest and upfront about everything. For all I know, mr. gay-sex-in-restroom’s wife says he can have all the gay sex he wants as long as he doesn’t bring it home. That’s the only excuse I can think of for Hilary staying with Bill. Otherwise, she loses points with me for staying with cheating scum.
on 08/30 at 04:15 AM
