Sunday, January 14, 2007

late at night

Moooo-oooom, I Don’t Want To Go To The Urologist Tomorrow

Yes indeed, I have an appointment with the urologist early in the morning.  I’d originally had an appointment for February 13th, but I just can’t afford to see an out of network doctor, even if he’s supposed to be one of the best in the city.  The guy I chose used to be in an office with the “best in the city” guy, until BITC guy moved across town, so maybe that’s a good sign.  He’s in a nice new office, in the same building where I got my MRI for my back.  He’s nearby.  Those are good things.  I went to pick up my paperwork, so I wouldn’t have to arrive 30 minutes early, because 9:50am is plenty early enough for me.  The office looked like, how do I say this nicely?  It looked like it was 2 for 1 Old Guy Day.  I know one of the doctors specilalizes in prostate stuff, so that could’ve been the reason it was full of men.

Last week, when I saw Leigh-Ann’s pain management doctor, and he was the second doctor in two weeks to not want to write me a one month prescription for Enablex (their website has a print-out for a one month free trial) without seeing a urologist, I decided it was time to finally give in.  I can’t stand this bladder thing anymore and it’s preventing me from doing a lot of things - fun things *and* not being able to work from anywhere but home.  I’m hoping the Enablex is all I need to make me better, but unfortunately I’m going to have to suffer the indignity of an exam to find out.  Blech.  It’s like going to the gynecologist, but worse.  Okay, maybe not worse.  The last time I went to the urologist, he was pretty fast.  I’m just afraid I’m going to have to have some icky tests, like ones that measure how much my bladder holds and tests like that.

Enough about the urologist, back to the pain management doctor.  He was nice, but he wasn’t as cheerful as when Leigh-Ann went to see him.  Still, he knows what he’s doing, I guess.  I’m now on 20mg of Oxycontin every eight hours (don’t believe what you read about Oxycontin, it’s not the slightest bit fun - no high whatsoever), and one 300mg Neurontin before bed to help with sleep.  I feel a little better, but the reflux from the pain meds is nasty.  I got a prescription for Aciphex, but only got a week’s worth to see if works.  I’m not that impressed, and my insurance doesn’t pay for it, so I’m not going to continue taking a pill that costs almost $7 a day.  I wish I could find something that would take away the reflux for good.  Unfortunately, the pain meds make it bad and like my bladder, stress makes it worse.  That doesn’t seem like it’s going to abate any time soon, so I’ll have to keep researching meds.  So far, Prilosec, Zantac, Nexium, and Aciphex don’t work. 

Oh yeah, and the pain management doc is sending me for blood tests.  If I feel okay after the urology appointment tomorrow, I’ll get the blood test on the way home.  He’s looking to see if I have MS or Rheumatoid Arthritis.  I’m almost positive that it couldn’t be RA.  I would think that I’d feel worse.  Also, written on the blood test prescription is Chronic Fatigue & Fibromyalgia - I don’t know if he’s ordering tests to see if that’s what I have or to rule out other stuff and confirm that’s what I have, but I guess I’ll see at my next appointment in a month.  I am always sore and tired, so I guess Chronic Fatigue and Fibromyalgia would be a reasonable diagnosis.  I wish I could just occasionally have some caffeine for pep, but I can’t do it unless I want to not be able to sit without having to pee, because caffeine makes my bladder much worse.  You know, I’m not having much fun being me these days.  My forties have kind of sucked so far.  My teens and pre-teens, those were some fine years.  Anyone have a time machine?  I’ll take Leigh-Ann back with me.

My apologies for my blog entries these days.  Ugh, they’re boring.  They bore me even to write them, but I’ve discovered that writing this stuff down is helpful when I’m trying to remember things.

Saturday, January 13, 2007

the wee hours

I Feel So Cheated

I was ripped off by the weather.  I was promised snow showers all day long.  What did I get in my neighborhood?  A five minute snow “shower”.  It was so lame that I almost could’ve stood outside and counted the snowflakes individually.  Other areas of town got more snow and I resent it!  I took pictures, so I have proof of our measly snow, but they’re not even worth posting.  Instead, I’ll post a picture from the big whopping “storm” of 2005.  It’s what we should’ve gotten, but didn’t.  Grrr.

Friday, January 12, 2007

the wee hours

It’s Gonna Snow, It’s Gonna Snow, It’s Gonna Snow!

I have my camera charging because I’m gonna get pictures of our forecasted “ONE SLUSHY INCH” of super awesometastic SNOW.  In Las Vegas.  Mind you, I don’t want any more than that, especially if we’re taking TJ to get his shots, but I love our snow that we get every two years or so.

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

the wee hours

New Year’s Resolutions

Last year I didn’t make any resolutions because I had one of the world’s worst colds.  All I wanted to do was get better.  Perhaps I should’ve resolved to be healthier in 2006 because back surgery, bladder weirdness, fibromyalgia, and sinus infections galore were pretty much how I’d sum up my year.  No, 2006 was not a year I’d like to repeat.  I suppose I could just resolve to be healthier this year and keep my fingers crossed.  But what the heck, I’ll be a little more ambitious.

I will lose these last (heh) pesky 40 pounds that I’ve been carrying around since I’ve become a pain filled sedentary lump.

I will clean off my desk and make it pretty and organized.

I will make more money and try to spend very little of it on medical bills.

I will not make friends with any fake people, unless I find them entertaining and they teach me new things.  Otherwise, no online friends who are impersonating famous Canadians.

I will try to get out of the house more.

I will make sure that, at the very least, Leigh-Ann gets to go to Canada to see her niece-to-be before she’s a year old.  Leigh-Ann’s sister is due next month.  I’d like to go too...and maybe see a Leafs game in person.

I’ll clean occasionally.

I’ll get good meds that will allow me to do the above.

I’ll finish my NaBloCoMo entries.  December is a bad month in which to attempt daily anythings.  Well, at least when life is attempting to spin out of control.

I will eat more sushi...and less pizza.

Sunday, January 07, 2007

late at night

One Overused Bladder For Sale

So, I can’t sit still again.  Maybe I could sell my bladder to someone rich in another country who would like to buy one.  Maybe it would behave in another body.  I have a doctor’s appointment for February 13th.  He’s out of network.  And all the way across town.  Whoo-pee.  I CAN’T CONCENTRATE!  All I want to do is sleep, because if I take meds, everything magically goes away while I’m asleep.  Everything.  I don’t even have to get up to go to the bathroom.  Boo-hoo.  Poor me.

Updated - I took some pain meds, my bladder calmed down, and now I feel like a completely different person.  Of course, now it’s after 2am and we have lunch plans with my mom at 12:30p.  It’s frustrating to not be able to work when I want to, and when I’m able, it’s almost always at an inconvenient time.  I need some magical pill or fairy dust.  I have an appointment later this week with a pain management doctor, so maybe he can help me become a productive member of society.  I’m sick of feeling like an invalid, and I’m sure you’re tired of reading about it too. That’s why I’ve disabled comments in this entry.  I wrote it to just whine and complain, but not to get any comments.  I’m more proud of the Hoops & Yoyo birthday card I made for Leigh-Ann.